What do you do when you find yourself slipping? Do you try to catch yourself? Do you blame the thing you slipped on? Do you reach out to grab something to stop the fall? Do you just expect the worse and hit the ground? No doubt about it, falling down is no fun and embarrassing. You could get hurt, you could hurt others? Did you know “slipping” is both a physical and spiritual thing? You can get tripped up and fall physically, but you can also get tripped up and fall spiritually.
As you know, the past year has been a crazy ride. And I am pretty sure the past year is taking a toll on me. I don’t like to admit defeat or show my weak side, but just keeping it real, I feel like I am slipping in both areas. I am physically and mentally drained most of the time. I haven’t opened my Bible in a couple of months. I have an negative attitude way too much. I find myself in dream land more than reality. This is a sucky, sucky place to be. But one thing I do know is I need to refocus myself and allow God to be in control again.
Just like when we physically fall, when I feel like I am slipping spiritually, I start to reach out and start grasping for anything to help the emptiness go away. Instead of hitting my knees and asking God for his hand, I turn away. And it seems the more I turn, the worse and more lost I feel. I have been here before, but it just seems like this time it is harder to find my way back. It is freaking me out.
So I am asking for a favor. If you are reading this and are a praying person, please pray for me. Pray for the fog to be lifted off me and I can find my way back to my killer-awesome self. I ask that you soften my heart for my family and to others. I want to bring God back as number one. Thank you.